Spirit Blog

I love women’s organizations. The people I meet who are working on feminist causes never cease to inspire me. I have encountered women around the world who dedicate their lives to the most outstanding causes – women’s health, human trafficking, lobbying, childcare, domestic violence, women’s economic empowerment, equality, leadership, gender in the media, education, and more. There is much work to be done for sure, but watching women’s intelligence and dedication always leaves me breathless.

Yet, I have seen some great women make some significant mistakes in the way they present their cause – whether to potential donors or to partners or to the media. I don’t believe that these mistakes have anything to do with any kind of inborn differences between men and women. It’s just a matter of training – how our cultures have taught women about what it means to be polite. Deborah Tannen, for example, has written extensively about women’s communication styles, how we like to be collaborative, accommodating and nice – all great qualities, except that they don’t help us with getting ahead. Linda Babcock and Sara Laschever also provide ample evidence in their book Women don’t Ask that women tend to shy away from saying exactly what we want and believe.

Women can learn to do this differently. Women who are the power and engines of gender or feminist-based organizations can acquire some skills – and grab a few good tips – to get the message across more powerfully and effectively. It’s about telling our stories in a way that we are heard.

Here are my top seven tips for women in not-for-profit to improve the way your story comes across:

• Stay positive. Women often feel the need to say the entire “truth”, which in women’s minds means exposing flaws, weaknesses, and uncertainties. There is no reason to expose all your warts to everyone. And so often, what you think are warts really aren’t. Just don’t go there. No matter what the setting, who the audience, or what the question is, always speak in positive terms about your work.
• Stand on your own authority. Women are plagued by the “fraud complex” – the fear that everyone else is smarter and better, and that they’re not really so good at what they do. If you have this voice in your head, remind yourself that you are NOT a fraud and that you ARE great at what you do. Only the smartest women are afraid of being frauds, so if this is you, rest assured that you are a smart woman!
• Forget the apology. If I had a dime for every time a woman opened up her presentation with some kind of apology. Women apologize for not having enough credentials, for talking too long or too short, for interfering with snack time, for not being learned enough or experienced enough to express a valid opinion. So here is a vital rule for women in written and verbal communication: Never, ever apologize. Just talk. Or write. Make your contribution.
• Self-promotion is not a dirty word. I have a friend who has two published books, once of which has won a series of awards and was reviewed in the New York Times – but hardly anyone knows because she hates what she calls “self-promotion”. She’s waiting for someone else to come along and tell the world about her awards. That’s a classic women’s stance, which sees self-promotion as some kind of impure, dirty thing. Let me just say, if you’ve won an award, you really should tell the whole world about it! That is exactly the kind of thing that Facebook is there for.
• Be decisive. So often women are afraid to respond to a question with a definitive answer. Women like to give all the possible scenarios and options. We are afraid of making a mistake. We are wary of committing to one direction when many possibilities lay ahead. We like collaboration. We want to share and reflect and see how things go. But decisiveness is often more valuable than keeping all options open all the time. Be firm in your belief, make your statement, and stick to it – unapologetically.
• Stay on message. Too often, I see women get distracted or swept away by issues and questions that are not relevant. Women tend to over-internalize all input, because we like being considerate. But this can sometimes weaken us. Don’t let other people’s agendas distract you from yours. Know your own agenda, and stick to it.
• Your power is in your passion – a calm, composed passion. Some women are afraid of expressing their passions. They are afraid of coming off as over-emotional, or heaven forbid being called “angry”. So they become dispassionate and over-analytical. I agree that it is important to stay composed during presentations. But being composed and calm does not mean becoming dispassionate. In fact, your strength comes from your belief system. People want to know about what you’re trying to do –and most importantly why. It is okay to be passionate about what you do –in fact, communicating your passion is the most important reason to communicate at all. Find ways to communicate your passion in ways that are concise, sharp, unequivocal, and smart.

If you think these ideas are helpful and want to learn more, This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. This is a big part of what I do best – helping women become better communicators, in writing and in speaking. The world needs to hear from you!

Sheryl Sandberg is about to become a very rich woman — and I’m really happy about it. The world needs more rich women, especially women who understand the importance of empowering other women.

The New York Times called Sandberg the “$1.6 billion woman,” based on the anticipated public offering of Facebook, where Sandberg is COO.

Sandberg, who has been a strong, vocal advocate for women’s advancement in the workplace, is actually one of the few women on top in Facebook. Tellingly, there are no women on the Facebook board, and Sandberg is the highest ranking woman in the company — number four from the top. Of the 10 most senior positions in the company, only three are held by women.

Certainly Sandberg has a reputation for promoting women’s successes at work — helping working mothers to find creative schedules and day care, encouraging women to be powerful and assertive, building a culture in which women’s real, complicated lives and concerns are welcomed rather than dismissed as signs of women’s lack of professionalism. But when it comes to women’s equality all the way to the top, the Facebook record remains mixed.

You want to get people to buy into your cause. You want to reach people and get them to go "wow". Then you want them to be invested, to make your cause their own, and ultimately to take action to support your cause. But how?

The process of building your support base is a function of the effectiveness of your  "Cause Marketing". At Spirit Consulting, we spend a lot of time working with clients on cause marketing communications -- that is, using your tools of communication to reach your goals.

Here are five tips for using Twitter to boost your cause marketing communications:

(1) 80/20 rule for self-promotion. Eighty percent of your tweets should be about something other than self-promotion. Send out links to articles related to your cause. Ask interesting questions. (Do NOT write about what you had for breakfast). Every fifth tweet can then be news about your own work -- a new campaign, an update about activities, a fundraising reminder. (Hattip to Ohad Flikler)

(2) Use keyword hashtags (#) for your cause. Think about what your cause is really about, the keywords of your cause, and don't be afraid to use those words in a hashtag (#). Think carefully about those keywords. So for example, if your cause is women's reproductive rights, find others tweeting about the issue by searching "#women's reproductive rights". You may be surprised at how much potential networking emerges.

(3) Respond to good content. Look for others tweeting about the same topics, and take the time to respond to the best content. For instance, if your cause is about  "poverty in India", then do a search for  "# poverty in India" and zero in on the ones that are really good. People will like to know that you share ideas and views.

(4) Mention your allies. Link to articles that your friends and allies have written or posted. People reallly appreciate your support (as you do theirs), and will often show their gratitude by supporting you back. Think of it as the twitter version of scratching each other's backs.

(5) Say thank you. When people re-tweet or mention you, don't forget to say thank you. Try not to get too entangled in extended conversations on twitter -- save those for private. But do take a moment to thank people for supporting you. This goes to one of the first rules of cause marketing: People really appreciate being appreciated!